B

What do you do when you’re blocked? I freewrite. That’s what I am doing here. I just keep my fingers going, typing on the keyboard, spitting out words, not stopping for anything. I don’t kow what my next sentence is so I keep typing. Why am I blocked? Why? There are a lot of B topics I could blog about. I could blog about blogging. I could blog about beauty. Or bitchiness. Or bits. Or brandy. Or bugger. Or bollocks—

Don’t the Brits have great swear words? So arcane, so bizarre, so regional. So rude. And yet with their accents they come off as being polite even when they’re describing animal testicles.

It was Writing With Power, by Peter Elbow, where I learned about freewriting and the act of separating the Creator within from the Editor within. You see, if your inner editor is too powerful, too ascendent, then nothing you write will be any good and your editor will have you deleting what you write long before any blue pencil could be brought into action. It’s the separation of the processes that is the key. Writing. Then Editing. Not both at the same time. Otherwise it’s like driving with your foot on the gas and the brake at the same time. Or trying to–never mind, I was going into some bathroom analogy that would be inappropriate for this venue.

Anyway, where was I? I was wondering what to write next. I have no idea so I’ll just keep going if you don’t mind. After all, if you get bored you can just click away. Amazingly foolish, that last sentence, actually asking you to click away. Not very wise of me, is it? But hey. What can I say? I’m freewriting. This is the uncensored truth. Or at least the unedited truth. Or at least the unedited blathering on of someone who was feeling blocked on this letter of the A to Z Challenge.

I mean, when you think about it, I’m in trouble if I have to resort to freewriting on only the second letter of the alphabet. I mean, how hard is B, anyway? It’s not like it’s X or something.

X. That will be a hard one. Most of the X words that come to mind actually use X as a word in some silly, colloquial way, like “X marks the spot” or “X Men,” where X means just a mark on a map indicating a point at the vertex of the two lines, or extraordinary, respectively.

So back to the freewriting. If I get stuck on F I’m not going to be able to go here again. That would be rather redundant, wouldn’t it?

Lest I bore, I’m going to stop bitching about Brits and bits and buggers and go have a glass of brandy, so that I can sit in the comfort of my home and think about all the things I could’ve blogged instead of this. Bye.